Metal Mouth

I'm going to get my teeth straightened. Coming from a poor family, my parents never had the money to get my teeth done. Now I'm 23 and I may not make a fortune, but I can have braces financed. It's going to cost $5,600 and I'm going to have to make an initial payment of $1,200 once I get them on. So I need to save up like a mofo in order to achieve my celebrity smile.

My teeth aren't too bad. If I smile head on you most likely won't notice, but if you see me smile on my right side you can tell one tooth is sticking out a little. And that annoys me like hell, so I'm going whack it into place with the help of my orthodontist. As well as a fix up that darn crowding problem. So in 18+ months time I'll be able to smile big and wide, like Julia Roberts. Yay for me!

Waxing woes

If there's one thing I suck at, it's waxing my legs. I can't wax to save my life. I can do my underarms and upperlips, but for the life of me I cannot figure out my legs. You'd think it'd be the easiest bit to do- it's a relatively flat, large surface. Even when I spend hundreds of dollars on different types of wax and waxing kits; strip wax, salon wax, pre-wax strips, it doesn't matter, it always goes pear shaped for me.

Which is why I just paid $19 to get a half leg wax done proffessionally. I just don't understand... how come, when the beautician applies the wax, it slides on smoothly and consistently? And when they tear the strip away, all the hairs come out? It's so not fair. But it looks like I'm going to always have to get my legs done at the beauty salon.

Superstar underarms

I had an IPL treatment on my underarms yesterday. Contrary to the claims, the f**king thing does hurt... a LOT. I was in tears. But it's all so worth it if, after the complete 6-8 treatments, I won't ever have to shave my armpits agian. I figured that all celebs would laser away any unwanted hair and go out without having to wax anything to make their life simpler. I thought I'd do the same thing. I'm sick of having to wait for the hair to grow a certain length before I can wax, or in an emergency situation, shave. It's quite costly but it's a small price to pay if it takes me one step closer to being like my idol. Maybe next year in winter I'll get my legs done too!

Why I want to be Kim Kardashian

Yo. Is Kim Kardashian not the hottest? I think I may have a tiny crush on her. It's not the "omg, like, I wanna f**k her" kind of crush. It's more like the "oh wow, she's so hot, I wish I were her" crush. And what's not to like about her? She's rich, hot, sexy, and did I mention hot? The appeal for me is that she's like a hot version of Paris Hilton. And yes, I admit that I do indeed admire Paris. Whatever! I've always loved Paris Hilton simply because she lead the simple life. Us girls all want that, and those who claim they'd rather be a starved african child than be rich and famous for doing nothing is totally kidding herself.

Kim K is living the life I wish I had. Plus she's hot. I want that kind of lifestyle... I want to be just as hot too. So here's the plan: to transform myself to be as Kim Kardashian-esque as possible. Complete with all the bells and whistles, but (sadly) minus the bank account. She is my idol, and that's why I'm going to follow in her footsteps.

Take today, for example. I cut my hair to the same length and style that Kim currently wears hers. It helps that I have black hair. In fact, I have several features similar to Kim's, and that may be why I subconciously choose to admire her just a tad more than Paris Hilton. My hair now reaches midway past my back and is layered just like so in the picture.

So, getting my hair done like someone else's may not be such a big deal, but I'm taking small baby steps towards my goal. I still have the body, the clothes, the attitude to work towards. And what about the lifestyle? Dolce&Gabbana, here I come!